If you ask any parent about their experience when raising children, most of them will say that they still haven't figured everything out. Parents can name a few examples of situations where they had doubts about their decisions.
This tells us that there is no one solution for every situation. One parenting style may be perfect for a given family, but it can cause trouble for the other family. Parents often question whether they have chosen the right path. The good news is that most psychologists and pediatric healthcare professionals agree that the most positive way of raising children is gentle parenting.
This article explains gentle parenting, its benefits and drawbacks, and how to get started. Keep reading to figure out if this approach is best in your case.
Understanding Gentle Parenting
So, what is gentle parenting, exactly? Simply put, it means raining kids without shaming, blaming, or punishing them. This parenting style focuses on both parents being partners and being involved in this collaborative parenting style.
Gentle parenting means a softer, gentler approach to parenting; parents or caregivers raise children by guiding them with a compassionate hand rather than a firm hand.
Instead of using punishment as a tool of communication, gentler parenting implies using democratic methods. These methods include clear communication and an explanation of what is good and bad. It relies on the connection between parents and their children.
These four main elements comprise the gentle parenting approach:
- boundaries;
- respect;
- empathy;
- understanding.
Parents set clear boundaries. If the kid breaches these boundaries, parents must be empathetic and understanding while explaining why the child shouldn't do that again. The communication is based on respect from both parties (the parent and the kid). Ideally, the child should build an understanding of how to behave while keeping respect towards their parents in the future.
Advantages And Disadvantages Of Gentle Parenting
Let's start with the positive and check out some of the benefits of adopting a gentle parenting approach:
- Better child-parent bonds.
- Reduced anxiety, especially in shy toddlers.
- Better social skills.
- Children better understand the concept of boundaries and know that they can have their boundaries.
- Kids get used to the fact that their voices can be heard.
But there are also a few drawbacks to this parenting approach:
- It's a time-consuming approach.
- Some parents face discipline problems.
If you're still willing to try this approach despite a few disadvantages, check out the next section of the article.
How To Get Started: Easy Tips To Get On Board
Now that you know what gentle parenting is and what the benefits and drawbacks let's figure out how to implement this approach into your family. One key fact to remember is that most child psychologists claim it's never too late to switch to gentle parenting.
If you have decided to change your parenting method, it's the right time. These are some easy steps you can take to switch to gentle parenting and improve your family home:
- Prioritize empathy. Refrain from assuming that your kids can immediately understand your orders and follow them. Your child is not a robot, and mistakes will happen. Try to put yourself in their shoes to understand how to explain things to your child so that you, at their age, would understand.
- Adopt flexibility. It's critical to have rules, too, while avoiding being harsh or judgemental. In some cases, you have to be more strict. In other cases, you have to be compassionate. These situations require you to be flexible.
- Set reasonable boundaries. You can only expect a little from a very young child. Ensure to set your boundaries according to the kid's age.
- Ensure you add reasons to boundaries and limits. Even a very young child would reasonably ask why they can't do something, and won't be satisfied with the answer "Because I'm your parent!", "Because I said so!" etc.
- Explain in simple words. Children can understand everything, but you need patience and good explanatory skills. Use simple words when explaining situations, boundaries, etc.
- Help kids learn when they make mistakes. As soon as you notice the kid making a mistake, immediately point out the mistake and explain why it is a mistake. Reward for good behavior, but do not punish the child; instead, punish their actions by not rewarding them.
- Connect with your child. Don't assume that you're superior just because you're older and are their parent/guardian. Try to understand why the child acted in a specific way in a certain situation.
You can start adopting these simple tips right away. Check if they are working and give positive results for your family. While experimenting with gentle parenting, you can find more information on this parenting style, for example, books or other blog articles.
